A Book is Judged by
its Cover
My visit with my 61
year old handicapped (with a history of spasticity) sister on a wheelchair to
the High Street Phoenix, Lower Parel, Mumbai on Sunday 18 August 2013, just
three days after our beloved country celebrated it’s 67th
Independence Day, perhaps, proves this.
Dressed in casual
trouser/shirt & chappals, I approached the entrance to the Palladium where
I was surprised, nay shocked, to find my entry blocked by the Security
personnel, who tried to turn me away by saying that the door to the Big Bazaar
side was closed. I told him that I had been here on 15th August,
2013 and it was open then, how come it was closed now? He put me onto his
senior who held us up at the gate for more than twenty minutes, whilst he was
communicating with a senior manager.
People were entering
through the Palladium gates and my sister was getting fretful and I was losing
patience. I asked the security person to state on what basis he was refusing
entry to me and my handicapped sister. But he had no answer to this. I found
this quite infuriating. It made a few people stop and turn their heads. But it
took two ladies (one named Ismat) and a gentleman to intervene in this
situation. They told the Security person that they knew a very senior person
managing this mall complex. The gentlemen also added they were from The Times
of India and this issue could really hit in the media in a big way. This was
communicated to the senior manager by the security person, who now came rushing
to the gates. We were allowed inside. My sister likes ice-cream. So I bought her a softee cone at McDonald’s.
Ismat and the other lady who had helped us came and met us near
McDonald’s. To pacify us and assuage the
hurt, another manager came. Lunch was offered. But I refused. We were provided
an escort to Big Bazaar where I did my shopping and was escorted to the exit
and a taxi outside.
After the Reliance
Fresh Signature Store incident, this somewhat similar experience, has forced me
to think beyond the reasons for their occurrence and recurrence. More than
anger, which, of course, is there initially, these incidents sadden me.
The handicapped
individual is almost a persona non grata, unproductive, a dead investment generally in the eyes of
most people. The alms-seeking beggar- stereotype of a person in a wheelchair
must change. Unless this happens at the individual level and positive thoughts/concept
translate into action, no amount of governmental measures or efforts by NGOs
shall change the world of the handicapped in India, in any substantial manner.
2 comments:
Percy Gilder wrote:
"When a book is judged by its cover
The fact that with my long, frayed beard I've often been mistaken for a terrorist notwithstanding, on Independence Day, I visited High Street Phoenix, with my eyes slyly downcast, a slightly shabby shirt (with tails hanging out), and dirty chappals.
With me was my 61 year old handicapped sister in a wheelchair.
What surprised me was that the security personnel, regarded me with suspicion and were uncomfortable about letting me into that public space among the crowds of women and children. When I asked why they had picked on me from among the other decently-dressed people, they got into a huddle with their senior security official, and I was made to wait out for a full twenty minutes. (It was almost as though they were saying : Being decently dressed doesn't mean being expensively dressed... being decently dressed only means being clean and dressing neatly.)
Not only was I getting sick and tired of this sort of nonsense, even my sister was becoming fretful. No one present could tell me what it was about our demeanour that was putting everyone off. I found it all so infuriating and a few people even turned to stare.
Luckily, two ladies and a gentleman intervened, and being from my community, they told the security personnel to let us in as they knew a very senior person in the Mall. The gentleman said that they were from the Times of India, and would print a press report about the extra precaution on the part of the security guards.
The next thing we know, is that the Senior Manager comes rushing to the gates with profuse apologies. We are allowed inside, and I buy my sister an icecream cone from MacDonalds. To further pacify us, another manager meets us and offers us lunch. We are even taken around to Big Bazaar where I do my shopping, and then get escorted to a taxi at the exit.
A few days ago, a similar thing had happened to us at a Reliance Fresh Signature Store. I still don't understand why anyone should be so intimidated by a man with an unruly beard and shabby clothes. I am sure the discrimination is all because of my handicapped sister. I'm sure it's her who must be looking like an alms-seeking beggar. I'm sure it's her who is causing so much fear in a mall full of children and women... Unless people stop seeing handicapped girls on wheelchairs as dangerous threats to public peace, all the efforts of the government and NGOs will go to waste."
Shakir Virpurwala replied:
"When a brother is involved with a 24 x 7 duty of taking care of his
twice operated handicapped (with a history of spasticity) sister, for
the past nine months, most people take it for granted.
So what if he has to sweep the house and mop the floors in the absence
of domestic help? So what if he has to wash her potty & clothes and
lift her from the chair and bathe her and dress her, sometimes ten
times a day and at times, have no time to bathe himself? So what if he
is kept on his toes day & night by her little, sometimes idiosyncratic
& exasperating demands? So what if he has to, at times, give her
dinner at 2 a.m. and sometimes make pakoras/cook for her at 4.00 a.m.?
So what if he has no time or way to visit the barber and finally
shaves his head at home? So what if he has to depend on erratic money
inflows from whimful friends and family to meet expenses? So what if
despite his painful, operated shoulder and swollen, septic toes, he
has to take her down for 'walks' on the mucky, ditch-filled roads and
to shop for their daily breakfast & her special diet requirements,
needs to wheel her, pushing her wheelchair, from Hajiali Govt.Colony (Near Lala Lajpatrai College) to the Mahalaxmi Reliance Signature Store, or Reliance Fresh Store at Mumbai Central or the Hirji's Dry Fruit Store at Masjid Bunder or the Parsi Dairy Farm at Princess Street or the Big Bazaar at High Street Phoenix, Lower Parel? So what?
His friend can sitting in a comfortable chair easily assume and write about the brother's long, frayed beard, shabby clothes, dirty chappals - even after not having met him for the past six months, having no
sibling responsibilities being the only child and having all the time
in the world to groom - shave, manicure, pedicure himself, wear propah clothes, pocketing a Rs.25000/- retainer every month - work or no work. But having no time to visit the handicapped sister and see her,yet indirectly assuming confidently that she was dressed like a princess, in her automated, state of the-art-wheel-chair?"
Apology has been received from Percy Gilder
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